Man Breaks into Porn Shop
Found Having Sex with Lovely Linda Blow Up Doll
Hey, there's nothing wrong with having a relationship with a blow up doll. Is there? In Virginia it's perfectly legal. It might even be perfectly normal behavior for customers of MVC Late Nite. The perp, Little Jim, a Veteranarian and Captain at Ft. Belvoir only broke the law when he committed burglary. When the police arrived with the canine unit in response to the alarm, the doggy grabbed hold of Little Jim's ankle.
Fortunately, the dog did not pop Little Jim's date, or puncture her. That would have deflated the story a bit. The dog did find Little Jim dressed in ladies panties.
Little Jim, Accused of Loving a Doll |
So far, the annonymous doll has not issued her official statement.
Not wanting to miss an opportunity at a free plug, Jerry Poe, the Manager of MVC stated: "Look these items are all very affordable. Anyone can buy them. That's why it is a bit odd someone would break in to steal them"
The real story is not the perverted nature of the crime, nor the sad lonely self image one must have to dress in women's panties and have sex with a doll in the closet after breaking into a porn shop. Nor is the story about a society or state supposedly conservative where it's legal to sell blow up sex dolls. I mean who knew? Or the possibility of copy cat crimes, now that the populace knows how available these dolls are, could others also start dating blow up dolls, or have sex with them in closets in their spare time?
Lost on all the news channels was the bravery of that dog. Going where no mere mortal would tread, that canine cop actually had the guts to grab hold of Little Jims ankle, while he was having his relations in that closet.
Such valorous deeds are rarely seen. We owe a debt of gratitude to that pooch for courage in the line of duty. Considering the facts of this case, Little Jim was found in stolen panties, in the act.
And humans say ferrets are fearless.
Original Story in the Washington Post http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/the-state-of-nova/post/woodbridge-soldier-accused-of-sex-with-plastic-doll/2011/07/06/gIQA5kPs0H_blog.html?wprss=the-state-of-nova
Follow Sam on Twitter http://twitter.com/Samuel_Clemons
Great blog about our unsung heroes. Those dogs should get more media play.
ReplyDeleteAs for Little Jim, I can only say I'm glad he is professional enough as a veterinarian that he stole a blow up doll rather than violate his clients.
Wow. This guy forgot to bring his suicide pill with him. I am guessing that his Army fitness report will be rather comical. Some Major will have a great time with it.
ReplyDeleteJH
How many ways do I love your wisdom and humor???
ReplyDeleteWell, at least he didn't hurt no one!
ReplyDeleteUhhh, geee, errrr, whaaaat a story, uh mmm no other comment & pat on the head to the 'canine cop'. luv to ya Sam from @grammakaye on twitter
ReplyDelete