"sammy, this is a story that I have to cover! buy me a ticket to Russia" i stared at the phone, as if it were uncle freddie in my hand, and not plastic and buttons.
why do we look at phones? is this something we've seen in the movies, where we stare stupidly at the phone?
flummoxed does not sit upon the countenance of a ferret well. it is documented that ferrets have no known predators. we used to chase mean, street hardened, life embittered sewer rats for a living! so it aint every day we get a look of flummoxation upon us.
uncle freddie is no stranger to the hair brained scheme. he once thought it would be a great idea for me to include the word diarrhea in all my posts for a few laughs.
a 28 year old female salon owner in Meshchovsk, Russia Olga Zajac, also a black belt in karate, kicked a robber, Viktor Jasinski, 32 who was trying to inflict criminal behavior upon her salon.
hazy pic of Olga blurred to protect her roots |
after knocking him out, Olga tied Viktor up in the back room with a blow dryer cord and had sex with him for 3 days, force feeding him Viagra.
this was to teach Viktor a lesson, apparently, and when she was finished with him, she gave him 1000 rubles and freed the object of her desires... or ran out of Viagra, that part is not quite clear.
indignant over being used as a sex slave Viktor went to the police, who eventually arrested both of them.
let this be a lesson to all the would be salon robbers: never run out of Viagra.
"uncle freddie, your sleuthing skills or reportage of this story are not required: it was covered in the Daily Mail.... obscured of course by the Rupert Murdoch debacle...but it's been covered...."
"sammy you moron, i don't want to cover the story. i want to meet this Olga.... sounds like my kind of gal"
and he calls me a moron
Truth is more bizarre than fiction. Right out of a Hollywood script.
ReplyDeletePiper's gonna hate she missed this one...
ReplyDeleteviagarated sexual assault... wow.
watch out guys... ;)
~cath
Twitter @jonesbabie
The Daily Mail finds some bizarre stuff! Although I am not surprised this happened in Russia, Viagra sold on street corners I have heard.
ReplyDeleteGreat job Sam!
If I didn't know better I'd say this Olga's a Trueblood fan. Are you sure she's not a werepanther from Hot Shot??
ReplyDeleteThat must have been some trick!!!
ReplyDeleteYou totally scooped me Sammy. I applaud you and intend to repost this if that's ok with you. What a hoot! Thank you for giving me a prolonged belly laugh. :)
ReplyDeleteLoL life embittered sewer rats. Too Funny!!!
ReplyDeleteI must have been napping...completely missed this. Please tell me you have not encouraged uncle freddie in this adventure should Olga die it could be the end of uncle freddie, Russian prisons are so not upto par and just think of the tattoos!!!!!!
ReplyDelete