Friday, September 23, 2011


tweets have to count.  twitter doesn't consider itself a "social network" but instead a microblogging site.  meaning, it's a blog, a record of what goes on.  but i don't get into  tweets like:  "i'm in my swimmy pool baff, and will be out in a minute"  to me, that is taking the whole idea of "micro" blog just a bit too micro.

there is the mathematical probability as well.  we have to understand our audience.  if i go to my "followers" list and see that well over half of them have fewer than 500 followers, then that has logical and common sense conclusions, at least for a ferret, you humans may come to another conclusion, and wallow in your oblivion, but we ferrets are too busy for oblivion, besides, we have to maintain a sense of decorum and dignity even if we are falling off the sofa in laughter.  ~wiggle wiggle~

ok, so let's break this down:  the Tweep only follows 200 people, half of whom are not even online right now, the other half have their Twitter open, but they are reading an article, or yelling at the kids.  the likelihood of them seeing a tweet from any one person is less than being struck by lightening or being hit by the space debris this morning.  ( the fastest way to see the following to follower ratio, or the following count is NOT on Twitter going thru one by one, but to log onto  which is FREE and set up the "columns" to show you the information you need, you'll see columns on the top tool bar after logging in )

so this leaves me no choice, my tweets have to count:  I HAVE to tweet something of value.  we have to tweet like we are the only tweet some people might see, because we ARE the only tweet they might see.  i'm just a lil furry ferret trying to be heard in a world of loud obnoxious humans, get my wiggles in, dance, nap, snack, have the twin masseuses over ( i have been paying their college tuition.. well, that's what they tell me ) write the next great critter novel, and still maintain an online presence ... whew! just writing that wore me out... not to mention get in calls to my therapist, and listen to my Uncle Freddie call me a moron every morning on speakerphone...

just last night, i tweeted this:  if God didn't intend to pilfer da smoked chickens, He wouldn't o left em on da coffee table

which is about as close as i get to micro talk... if it's going to be a mundane event, it's going to count....  i could have said:  "this smoked chicken is really good"  and in which case, you would think, "yea, but my smoked lobster was better"  or whatever else if anything.  but the idea here is that it has to be interesting...

 what kind of a pet human takes the time ( two hours ) to smoke a chicken, and leave it out on the table where i can snag it.....?? 


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  1. The kind that loves his fert and secretly wants him to have it. Everyone knows ferts like things they're not supposed to have. It wouldn't have tasted as good if it'd been served up on a silver platter to ya!

  2. For a ferret, you make excellent points. Which is better than the ferret I knew in college: he got squished under a mattress by accident... He probably could've used your guidance.


  3. Those chickens do look irresistable, Sam. I can see where they might have been set down for a second, and you leaped upon them with ferret zeal.

    Yes, I loathe the tweets that update us on every little thing, although some of them are funny whether by intent or not. The other day I saw one: "I don't eat the first slice of bread because it's ugly" I almost retweeted that one!

    Others are just so mundane as to provide no value whatsoever. AND you had a higher Klout score than I did for well over a year, so you were one of the motivations for me to get off my hind end and start tweeting more links, interracting a bit more, and work harder at finding interesting links. So I guess we can all learn from you.

    Only you would take some smoked chickens and make a blog post of them!

    Lonny Dunn I Tweet at @ProNetworkBuild

  4. I keep my numbers small on Twitter. That way when I make a total arse out of myself, only a few people are aware of it. We're following each other now, I'll try not to piss ya off :)

    aka Anne