if only it were as easy as saying it, or singing it, deficits, world hunger, weiners, high umployment, the taliban, beltway traffic here in DC ~ if we could sing it all away, and live in heaven now, why wait? doesn't every generation think it has it's problems? and yet, we live in a grand world, and it is what we make it. so here's to ranting, and here's to all the rants before and that will come when we are gone. today's theme:
Friday, June 17, 2011
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Caesar Crossed The Rubicon
as a general, Caesar was not allowed to cross the Rubicon river, no general was permitted to do so under the prevailing customs and laws of his time. the act of doing so constituted civil war, and in fact one ensued. after conquering most of europe all the way to Briton, Caesar was called back to Rome by the Senate. if he obeyed and went to Rome without his Legions he might have been tried for past deeds. legend has it that he said "the die is cast" i won't hedge the Latin, but that is close enough.
like Caesar of old, i have been challenged. last night, i was called to Rome by MorgansDead. let me find the tweet, oh here it is:
Polar Bear is like the cutest big boy ferret ever! Sorry @Samuel_Clemons my Polar Bear is cuter than you
arrangements are being made, i'm being coiffed and groomed, the twin masseuses have been called in to calm my nerves, my best accessories are being laid out ( GI joe helmets, micro headsets, navy scarf ) the entire far flung ferret clans are being notified and rounded up, guests will soon arrive, electricity and excitement are in the air, peanut butter and banana slices are laid out nicely ~ all visiting ferrets must have plenty of sleeping bags ~ all for the Great Ferret Cute Off ~ oh yes, the die is cast
this just in: "Sam, seriously. you compare your cuteness being challenged to Caesar crossing the Rubicon?" mary, my detractor.
me: mary, will you be bringing any guests?
---------------------------------------
after checking on my pile of poptart wrappers, and left footed socks,
with all the goings on, and so much to do, i have done what any manic, pampered, slightly hyper ferret would do in these die cast circumstances.....
i've increased my nap schedule
follow sam on twitter http://twitter.com/samuel_clemons
 |
| Caesar Crossing the Rubicon Image The Rubicon No Longer Exists |
like Caesar of old, i have been challenged. last night, i was called to Rome by MorgansDead. let me find the tweet, oh here it is:
Polar Bear is like the cutest big boy ferret ever! Sorry @Samuel_Clemons my Polar Bear is cuter than you
arrangements are being made, i'm being coiffed and groomed, the twin masseuses have been called in to calm my nerves, my best accessories are being laid out ( GI joe helmets, micro headsets, navy scarf ) the entire far flung ferret clans are being notified and rounded up, guests will soon arrive, electricity and excitement are in the air, peanut butter and banana slices are laid out nicely ~ all visiting ferrets must have plenty of sleeping bags ~ all for the Great Ferret Cute Off ~ oh yes, the die is cast
this just in: "Sam, seriously. you compare your cuteness being challenged to Caesar crossing the Rubicon?" mary, my detractor.
me: mary, will you be bringing any guests?
---------------------------------------
after checking on my pile of poptart wrappers, and left footed socks,
with all the goings on, and so much to do, i have done what any manic, pampered, slightly hyper ferret would do in these die cast circumstances.....
i've increased my nap schedule
follow sam on twitter http://twitter.com/samuel_clemons
Friday, June 10, 2011
What Passes for News
What passes for News these days is downright ridiculous. I rarely comment on politics as it dates one's blog. Three months from now the story becomes irrelevant, the facts change, one's predictions are all proved wrong. So normally I don't do politics, or politicians. But I have a few observations, and I'll keep them brief. Actually, this all started when I wrote a piece for The Critical Post (follow on twitter: http://twitter.com/thecriticalpost entitled "Breitbart's Hoax" ~ how an article in the Daily Kos was completely fabricated, invented and perpetrated using social media to prove that Congressman A. Weiner's Twitter WAS NOT hacked, and the entire story was a hoax perpetuated by Breitbart. So brazen was the story it was entitled "Breitbarts Twitter Hoax".
This is not the first time that I have done my Hunter S. Thompson best at being a media critic; I should quit my day job, and do it full time. I can smell a fabricated tale a mile away.
The mainstream press today has taken to "sounding the death knoll for Newt Gingrich's Presidential Campaign" that is to say, all of his top aides walked out en masse. And I say, "So What?" The media wasn't there and for all we know, he fired them, and has graciously kept his mouth shut about how they were fired. We don't know, but to sound the end of his campaign? Ha! One of the smartest men in politics, don't count Gingrich out. It is almost as if willing the story into existence, by sheer momentum, the major news outlets can be their own cause/effect and make it so.
On Anthony Weiner's wife's pregnancy? Oh wow! The mainstream press jumped all over that didn't they? Did they actually even stop to consider the source? Do they have a source? A woman who refuses to grant interviews, doesn't want to comment on her husband's weiner, and has no intention of being seen in front of a camera, is supposedly one who "shuns the limelight" ..... yet, here the mainstream press is buying and selling the story that she's pregnant? Sounds fishy to say the least. Why would someone who is so private want to announce to the world that she is pregnant? Obviously, this is a ploy to garner sympathy and I for one doubt the validity of the story at all. And make no mistake, working for Sec of State Hillary Clinton, the PR machine knows how to garner sympathy and plant a story, even one so far fetched that Weiner's wife Uma is pregnant.
Lastly, we are seeing news outlets like MSNBC, CNN and their ilk actually try to talk up scenarios where Anthony Weiner stays in office. Even knowing this would be a complete embarrassment to himself and our government institutions. In my humble opinion, perpetuating an idea that endangers our already dwindling reputation across the globe is not responsible journalism. Will they balk when his male member is shown on the House floor? Will they finally cave in when his phallic anatomy is printed on playing cards and traded in High Schools? Or used by extremists in other countries to prove the United States is a weak, and sex crazed country who's politicians are all perverts? This is the end game in allowing people who have no control over their body parts ( and apparently cameras ) hang around beyond what is prudent.
I question what I hear. I do not buy into what is thrown at me in heavy doses. Any overkill by the mainstream press should trigger our natural instinct that something is not correct. More often than not, we are being fed a complete fabrication, invented news. What passes for "News" is just rehashed stuff where sources are not proven, or even quoted.
What passes for news brings out the ferret in me.
_____________________________________________
follow the Sarcastic One on Twitter: http://twitter.com/samuel_clemons
dedicated to @libertyladyusa and @piperbayard on twitter
This is not the first time that I have done my Hunter S. Thompson best at being a media critic; I should quit my day job, and do it full time. I can smell a fabricated tale a mile away.
The mainstream press today has taken to "sounding the death knoll for Newt Gingrich's Presidential Campaign" that is to say, all of his top aides walked out en masse. And I say, "So What?" The media wasn't there and for all we know, he fired them, and has graciously kept his mouth shut about how they were fired. We don't know, but to sound the end of his campaign? Ha! One of the smartest men in politics, don't count Gingrich out. It is almost as if willing the story into existence, by sheer momentum, the major news outlets can be their own cause/effect and make it so.
On Anthony Weiner's wife's pregnancy? Oh wow! The mainstream press jumped all over that didn't they? Did they actually even stop to consider the source? Do they have a source? A woman who refuses to grant interviews, doesn't want to comment on her husband's weiner, and has no intention of being seen in front of a camera, is supposedly one who "shuns the limelight" ..... yet, here the mainstream press is buying and selling the story that she's pregnant? Sounds fishy to say the least. Why would someone who is so private want to announce to the world that she is pregnant? Obviously, this is a ploy to garner sympathy and I for one doubt the validity of the story at all. And make no mistake, working for Sec of State Hillary Clinton, the PR machine knows how to garner sympathy and plant a story, even one so far fetched that Weiner's wife Uma is pregnant.
 |
| Huma Abedin Pregnant? Who Is Ruthless Enough to Plant these Stories? |
Lastly, we are seeing news outlets like MSNBC, CNN and their ilk actually try to talk up scenarios where Anthony Weiner stays in office. Even knowing this would be a complete embarrassment to himself and our government institutions. In my humble opinion, perpetuating an idea that endangers our already dwindling reputation across the globe is not responsible journalism. Will they balk when his male member is shown on the House floor? Will they finally cave in when his phallic anatomy is printed on playing cards and traded in High Schools? Or used by extremists in other countries to prove the United States is a weak, and sex crazed country who's politicians are all perverts? This is the end game in allowing people who have no control over their body parts ( and apparently cameras ) hang around beyond what is prudent.
I question what I hear. I do not buy into what is thrown at me in heavy doses. Any overkill by the mainstream press should trigger our natural instinct that something is not correct. More often than not, we are being fed a complete fabrication, invented news. What passes for "News" is just rehashed stuff where sources are not proven, or even quoted.
What passes for news brings out the ferret in me.
_____________________________________________
follow the Sarcastic One on Twitter: http://twitter.com/samuel_clemons
dedicated to @libertyladyusa and @piperbayard on twitter
Saturday, June 4, 2011
friends are priceless
prologue: the beautific wood elf @ouchdammit had reconnoitred the path, clandestinely assuring us of safe passage to our destination.
________________________________________________________
harriet old beyond years innumerable, bigfoot who's only thing in common with hairret was his hair, and myself made a motley crew indeed. size 24 lumbering along with his lengthy stride, me perched on harriet's head; both of them chattering away:
"i say we give em a good scare and bum's rush 'em" said harriet. although from virginia, for whatever reasons she spoke with a hackneyed accent. in another life, i think she tried out for 101 Dalmatians but they gave the part to another horse. harriet didn't do much, she mostly stared off into space. i coaxed her out of the barn with promises of an adventure.
size 24: "i've been scaring critters and humans enough, harriet, my PR guru here says i need to improve my image."
"i'll decide when we get there, and both of you need to focus on the trees and quit jabbering." i half expected an acorn shot to my head any second from the squirrel clan.
as i rode, i couldn't help but think i looked quite dashing in my colonels helmet, my micro headset from Japan cavalierly dangling round my neck.
______________________________________________
the fat squirrel was porking away on a delicacy, as usual, when he saw me approach, barely giving away any astonishment. frankly, i don't think he'd lose his morsel for any surprise. he looked more like a groundhog or woodchuck than a squirrel. he must tax the whole woods, could hardly walk. cheek full of chewed acorn, a bit dribbled down his jowl as he spoke:
"if it aint the self styled colonel of the ferret militia... what brings you here, sammy ol boy" ... contempt oozing from his lips, as the nut particles sprayed.
"your niece is galavanting around with my uncle freddie and the two make a pair i must say. she's talking of marriage, and i know it's never been done. a squirrel and a ferret, we've got to stop this." i'd half suspected this was a plot to get to the family fortune.
"how'd you get here anyway? my lookouts and scouts didn't make a peep. i haven't heard so much as a warning plunk off that helmet of yours sam."
"don't change the subject, you fat porker...I have my ways of creeping through the woods. it's bad enough i have to come parlay with ya..."
a hoof pawed the ground. a snort. then a rukus and commotion ensued as the sound of branches snapped, as harriet released her energy and raw power and came thundering into the clearing ~ size 24 stayed back ~ her display was remarkable, i'll give her that.
fatso was round eyed, astonished and understood immediately why his scouts had remained silent. they had run and were hidden at the site of harriet, big foot and myself stealing through their turf. acceptance and shock at once settled over him.
"enough talk" said harriet as she scooped me up with one motion, airward i went, to plunk comfortably between her ears. "enough. sam says do something about your niece. are you clear on this?"
he shook his head yes, as she spun around and gave a demonstration that we didn't know she had in her, she galloped again!! harriet ran, more like charged out of that woodsy clearing with me hanging on to her ears for dear life, grinning as the air blew past my fur, and the freedom of running pulsed through her was transferred to me and i felt like i was upon the most brilliant steed in any race before or since. oh the delight to be upon harriet and her just showing off was pure heaven.
she blew past astonished sized 24 and ducked her head on the low hanging branches, careful not to knock me off.... "that oughta give em something to think about sammy..."
indeed. and you should never underestimate an old nag when she get's her dander up.
____________________________________________________
Some Companion pieces to this story you might also like:
http://samuelclemons.blogspot.com/2011/03/ferrets-bane.html
story is dedicated to all the harriets who still have life left to surprise even their staunchest friends. to @falloutgrrl and doc who take care of hurt animals so they can scare squirrels again, and of course to my best bud, Big Foot, afraid he might scare somebody. it's ok size 24, i know you've got a heart of gold and are a friend to us all.
hit the google "PLUS 1" Button Below, and Let's try out the new technology. Thanks!
________________________________________________________
harriet old beyond years innumerable, bigfoot who's only thing in common with hairret was his hair, and myself made a motley crew indeed. size 24 lumbering along with his lengthy stride, me perched on harriet's head; both of them chattering away:
"i say we give em a good scare and bum's rush 'em" said harriet. although from virginia, for whatever reasons she spoke with a hackneyed accent. in another life, i think she tried out for 101 Dalmatians but they gave the part to another horse. harriet didn't do much, she mostly stared off into space. i coaxed her out of the barn with promises of an adventure.
 |
| the infamous harriet, retired. withdrawn |
size 24: "i've been scaring critters and humans enough, harriet, my PR guru here says i need to improve my image."
 |
| size 24 afraid to scare someone my best bud |
"i'll decide when we get there, and both of you need to focus on the trees and quit jabbering." i half expected an acorn shot to my head any second from the squirrel clan.
as i rode, i couldn't help but think i looked quite dashing in my colonels helmet, my micro headset from Japan cavalierly dangling round my neck.
______________________________________________
the fat squirrel was porking away on a delicacy, as usual, when he saw me approach, barely giving away any astonishment. frankly, i don't think he'd lose his morsel for any surprise. he looked more like a groundhog or woodchuck than a squirrel. he must tax the whole woods, could hardly walk. cheek full of chewed acorn, a bit dribbled down his jowl as he spoke:
"if it aint the self styled colonel of the ferret militia... what brings you here, sammy ol boy" ... contempt oozing from his lips, as the nut particles sprayed.
"your niece is galavanting around with my uncle freddie and the two make a pair i must say. she's talking of marriage, and i know it's never been done. a squirrel and a ferret, we've got to stop this." i'd half suspected this was a plot to get to the family fortune.
"how'd you get here anyway? my lookouts and scouts didn't make a peep. i haven't heard so much as a warning plunk off that helmet of yours sam."
"don't change the subject, you fat porker...I have my ways of creeping through the woods. it's bad enough i have to come parlay with ya..."
a hoof pawed the ground. a snort. then a rukus and commotion ensued as the sound of branches snapped, as harriet released her energy and raw power and came thundering into the clearing ~ size 24 stayed back ~ her display was remarkable, i'll give her that.
fatso was round eyed, astonished and understood immediately why his scouts had remained silent. they had run and were hidden at the site of harriet, big foot and myself stealing through their turf. acceptance and shock at once settled over him.
"enough talk" said harriet as she scooped me up with one motion, airward i went, to plunk comfortably between her ears. "enough. sam says do something about your niece. are you clear on this?"
he shook his head yes, as she spun around and gave a demonstration that we didn't know she had in her, she galloped again!! harriet ran, more like charged out of that woodsy clearing with me hanging on to her ears for dear life, grinning as the air blew past my fur, and the freedom of running pulsed through her was transferred to me and i felt like i was upon the most brilliant steed in any race before or since. oh the delight to be upon harriet and her just showing off was pure heaven.
she blew past astonished sized 24 and ducked her head on the low hanging branches, careful not to knock me off.... "that oughta give em something to think about sammy..."
indeed. and you should never underestimate an old nag when she get's her dander up.
____________________________________________________
Some Companion pieces to this story you might also like:
story is dedicated to all the harriets who still have life left to surprise even their staunchest friends. to @falloutgrrl and doc who take care of hurt animals so they can scare squirrels again, and of course to my best bud, Big Foot, afraid he might scare somebody. it's ok size 24, i know you've got a heart of gold and are a friend to us all.
hit the google "PLUS 1" Button Below, and Let's try out the new technology. Thanks!
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