Monday, March 7, 2011

never compromise

after the solar flares knocked out the power grid in 2013 http://www.telegraph.co.uk/science/space/7819201/Nasa-warns-solar-flares-from-huge-space-storm-will-cause-devastation.html  the only surviving critters not involved in inter specie wars were the sloths and iguanas.    strange that the abundance of electricity produced by the flares, then the sudden outages would keep these two groups apart.  it was a well known fact they never got along, yet they didn't fight in this new eerie post electric world.

the ferret squirrel wars were particularly nasty.  the ferrets emerged post flare up  to dance and rule the world by their usual method: mass manipulation by cuteness. heckled by the squirrels who threw nuts and odd tree fruits, the ferrets tolerated it only so long.  the epic conflict which ensued put sam in an intolerable position as leader of the ferret faction against the squirrels.  the squirrels no longer employed by Geico, unable to live the hollywood lifestyle, were prone to bipolar rants and fits of nut throwing.  particularly embarrasing, uncle freddie was still dating a squirrel, even though he wasn't  divorced.  freddie  rode around town laughing it up, and embarrassing his burrow, and colonel sam. 
                                       sam believed all ferrets should dance in peace

calling himself the colonel, sam fancied himself a cross between bob hope and patton.  helmeted, goggle clad, and riding on big foot's shoulder, he'd walk around his encampment ranting that the he should have finished off the squirrels years ago.
                                                            the enemy

"sometimes squatch, you are not correct.  you can't always be right" sam said.

size 24 replied, very convincingly: "sam, and sometimes, you just have to make peace, they are after all ~ well,  they're just squirrels..." and tapered off.

                                                      ever faithful friend

"easy for you to say..."

thwack.  plunk.

the thwack:  the noise of a tree branch having been pulled back, and used as a projectile launching device ~ the plunk which  followed was the metallic noise it made as an acorn bounced off of sam's helmet.

a direct hit to the colonel's pride.

he looked into sasquatch's eyes, who imperceptibly turned and looked into sam's.

"maybe you're right"  they both said simultaneously.

laughing they set off to find uncle freddie.  let him broker the deal.



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more on this story thread: No Cease Fire   http://samuelclemons.blogspot.com/2011/03/no-cease-fire.html

and Ferret's Bane:  http://samuelclemons.blogspot.com/2011/03/ferrets-bane.html

finding big foot http://samuelclemons.blogspot.com/2011/02/i-found-bigfoot.html

follow sam on twitter

10 comments:

  1. Love the pictures! I had no idea squirrels could be so troublesome to ferrets. Glad you have sasquatch on your side.

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  2. The Ferret Squirrel Wars. Man that's just aching for a full blown novel length write up. Now I understand the colonel reference.

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  3. But I feed my squirrels. I love their little bushy tails. I hear that ferretts smell a bit funky. No offense. But I must say that I would prefer a ferret in my living room to a squirrel any day. Peace. molly xo

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  4. I love ferrets especial the Sams of the world. My twin loves squirrels I dont they tease the dogs I'd like to shoot me a black one. They cant get little blacky out of the tree to double team. A shot would do the trick.

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  5. W~i~g~g~l~e Reminds me that I saw two white squirrels the other day acting curiously quite squirrely...I'm still trying to ferret that out!

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    Replies
    1. Me too...I am after all #2 or is it #1 KatZapp

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  6. W~i~g~g~l~e Reminds me that I saw two white squirrels the other day acting curiously quite squirrely...I'm still trying to ferret that out!

    ReplyDelete
  7. W~i~g~g~l~e Reminds me that I saw two white squirrels the other day acting curiously quite squirrely...I'm still trying to ferret that out!

    ReplyDelete
  8. W~i~g~g~l~e Reminds me that I saw two white squirrels the other day acting curiously quite squirrely...I'm still trying to ferret that out!

    ReplyDelete